An English Message Follows,

Hast thou found thy written work lacking in pith? Looketh thee upon thy composition with contempt for its facile nature and hollow countenance? Fret no more dear friend for a solution is yet at hand.

Be it for an amorous epistle or a mere lively discourse, elevation and ofttimes arcanisation of speech can, in the most peculiar of hearts, a sense of strange joy bring.

For naught but a fool's pittance, this humble scribe will thy message recompose, nay transform into an imitation of the art of that greatest of bards, William Shakespeare.

If, by his lack of merit, the writer did thy sensitivities offend, save ye yet thy spite for, although it be written, the words were but in jest. Should such a jest to thine spirit appear, contact ye anon the scribe through personal message or carrier pigeon.

-------------------------

For a bit of linguistic fun, I'm offering to edit a small piece of writing to make it look like it came from Shakespeare's time. I'm not an expert on Early Modern English but I have studied a lot of Shakespeare and I've been told I do a decent job of imitating his style.