I'm not really sure how to describe in the best way why this is something I feel might help me get over this hump, but, here goes.

I recognize I am struggling with a self diagnosed eating disorder, and suffering with the repercussions of overspending on junk food "meals." I am trying to retrain my taste buds but also not be so strict with myself that I can't enjoy anything, so I figured making connections and building strength through someone else's positive meals would be a decent way of distracting me through this month and maybe into the next, so I can regain SOME ground from the financial trouble this habit has caused me.

I took out literally my last available credit on a card so that I could buy a decent bag of CAT food, and ironically I myself am living off a supply of tuna fish despite desperately needing a palate cleanse. There has to be a silver lining.

A few months ago i came off of a depression medication and have dedinitely been dragging myself through life ever since. Fostering my interests in an affordable way, trying to get out of bed to work (and failing,) cavities, deterioration of my cat's health, and just trying to stay on good sleeping, health habits etc. have just been unmanageable, and my finances are in the hole.

I am clinging, and am on an upswing of not having binged on any junk in a few days.

Today I spent money I reallly don't "have" (that, for instance needs to go to car insurance COLLECTIONS) on something POSITIVE! 3.15 lbs of prepared food from #wholefoods for $8 plus 2/$6 Kombuchas! Their #meatlessmonday deal. Realistically I can't keep up with that either, but I am proud of refraining from junk.

I joined a superfoods team and have been trying to transition that into a means of new income, but that takes time, and my mindset isn't completely there. I've been lacking the therapy I really need because I'm so slow with the medical application process...

There's this fire inside me to cling to life and heal from the inside out I can just feel it, but I can't pretend that I don't need help and damn it is hard to ask.
I have 200 Simbi at the moment. If i divide that by 20, that means I can provide 10 Simbi in exchange for each meal. And maybe even a song as well. Idk. I'm obviously horrible at coming up with set systems of conservation and patience following through with them but I'm at least brainstorming.

I could probably ask my friends, but I'd also like to feel like this is a compromise I can make and earn myself, and maybe that will help my new habits stick better than just taking a hand from people who would go over the top to provide quick fixes for me. I don't believe in a quick fix.

P.S. if any of the friends i've invited to just check out my profile in hopes that you join Simbi are reading this, please don't reach out to me personally and give me more than I am asking for, consider participating through this platform. Thanks for the support.